Know Thyself…

The times I’ve become sad or scared lately have been when I’ve listened to other people’s estimations of how I ‘should’ be feeling.

To clarify, people are NOT being mean or judgmental.  I’m referring to the nicest, most well intentioned individuals telling me “You don’t have to pretend honey.  It’s ok to be sad.  Anyone in your position would be.”  “You don’t have to throw yourself into your work to cover your grief.” Or  “Let it out.  You know you want to.”

And then I think I’m letting them down for not feeling badly enough.  (sniff, sniff)  But here’s the thing…

  1. I honestly see positive aspects of even the most challenging times.
  2. I’m working a lot because I enjoy it.
  3. I feel as deeply as the next person, I cry.  I simply move past it quicker to a better mental state because frankly it’s more fun and productive there.
  4. I can appreciate various perspectives while still being true to my own emotions.

My question for you is…who is in control of your emotions?  Do you allow other people to talk you into drama?  Do you give in to the negativity?  Or do you tell yourself, “I’m stronger than they know and I choose to live with intention, see the beauty, take advantage of the opportunities that surround me, and share compassion and love.” 

“He to whom the emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause and stand wrapped in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.”  ~Albert Einstein

Action Step:  Once a day for the next week find a time to take stock of your feelings.  Simply sit and feel what’s in your heart.  Are you angry, sad, joyful, frustrated, amorous, hopeful, contemplative, excited?  What are you feeling??  Then backtrack to the thoughts that precipitated the emotion.  “My boss is hard on me.” “My spouse is so sweet!” “It’s a rainy, miserable day.”  Our thoughts and perceptions impact our emotions but it’s easier to get in touch with our feelings first.  Practice and soon you’ll be able to adapt your thoughts to create more empowering, productive emotions! 

Want to work with me?


About FindYourFire

Writer, speaker, and life coach Heather O'Neill is president of Progressive Image and creator of the Fire in Five program...helping people reconnect and find the joy in their lives.
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